Lunch Drawing: Talking to Drunk Girls

Lunch Drawing: Talking to Drunk Girls

This is another of my “Lunch Drawings.” It came from an encounter with some drunk girls at Black Dog, the greatest gelato place in Chicago. These young women were shit-faced and trying to eat gelato and play with my dog, Chooch. Chooch ate their gelato and they giggled until one of them puked like a firehose.

I held her hair so she wouldn’t zuke in it, then they cried and told each other they loved each other and they loved me for not letting their friend puke in her own hair. There was some puke on my shoes but it was no big deal. I felt bad for her; I can remember many a night this also afflicted me.

I told them to stay away from the sweet shit… that if they started out drinking vodka, bourbon, and beer, then goddamit. they should stick with vodka, bourbon, and beer. I told them it was the appletinis that fucked their night up, and that NO male wants to knock boots with anyone who would pour apple juice into perfectly good vodka. Most men would sooner go home with a girl with a nose wart. They thanked me.

Published in: on September 17, 2013 at 12:02 am  Comments (3)  
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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Reblogged this on The Boston Harbor Picayune.

  2. Okay, so I’d hope that no male would want to knock boots with any female who’s already puking drunk at LUNCH, never mind what she added to the vodka, right? Maybe I’m old school.

  3. Reblogged this on Liturgical Credo.

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